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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25716430">P&amp;F HISHE's</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/zapdosmaster145/pseuds/zapdosmaster145'>zapdosmaster145</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Phineas and Ferb</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:54:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,163</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25716430</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/zapdosmaster145/pseuds/zapdosmaster145</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>HISHE: How It Should Have Ended. Just like the YouTube, you know the ones I'm talking about? Because sometimes, there are simply easier ways to resolve the plot! Includes all specials and movies. Originally posted on FFN.net</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Across the Second Dimension</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Phineas peeked around the metal cylinder, watching as Evil Doofenshmirtz banged on the control panel and complained about it not working. Phineas scanned the electronic equipment that was scattered about, and quickly realized what the would-be dictator was doing. "Oh, so that satellite dish is what's controlling the robots!" he whispered. "That gives me an idea." Raising his voice, the red-head shouted to the city below: "BALJEET?! Get up here!"</p><p>No sooner had he shouted out than Baljeet flew up to the rooftop, still clad in the Beak supersuit. "Egg missile!" Baljeet yelled as he pointed his arm at the satellite dish. An egg shaped missile blasted forth from the suit and exploded on impact with the machine, blowing it to bits.</p><p>"NO!" Screamed second dimension Doofenshmirtz, falling to his knees in failure. In the streets below, people rejoiced as the Normbots that had been harassing the city fell from the sky and crashed in giant heaps of scrap metal.</p><p>At that moment, Ferb pulled himself up over the ledge with the plungers he'd used as makeshift suction cups. Inspecting the wreckage, he watched as Agent P cuffed the evil scientist before he could reveal any more tricks up his sleeve. Ferb dropped his plungers to look at the camera and said, "Well, that was remarkably easy."</p><p>
  <strong>How Phineas and Ferb: Across the Second Dimension Should Have Ended</strong>
</p>
<hr/><p>"Is every platypus named Perry?" Doofenshmirtz asked.</p><p>"In a perfect world, yes."</p><p>"Well, he's a cute little fella. Hi there!" Doofenshmirtz bent over to scratch the monotreme only to be bitten. "Cuchie-cuchie-OUCH!" He yelled sharply.</p><p>"No, Perry! We do not bite the elderly!" Phineas apologized.</p><p>"Again, ow. It's okay, platypuses don't typically like me."</p><p>"Well, Perry, you're just in time to watch us open a portal to another dimension!" As Phineas was just about to place the final piece, Perry jumped and grabbed it out of his hands and scuttled off to hide under a table.</p><p>"Perry! What are you doing?" Phineas scolded the platypus, took away the part, and turned back to finish the machine.</p><p>"Remember," the hologram on Agent P's wristwatch was saying, "if your cover's blown, you'll never see the boys again."</p><p>"Hey, does anyone hear someone talking?" Doofenshmirtz asked.</p><p>"Never see them again…" Perry quickly shut off the projection.</p><p>"Okay, here we go!" As Phineas was boosted up to put it in its place, he suddenly heard a liquidy noise that made him cringe. Phineas looked down to see that Perry had lifted his leg to pee on the machine! Sparks flew everywhere and the machine drooped cartoonishly.</p><p>"Perry, no! Not on the machine! Oh, I'm sorry, Dr. D., we should take him out."</p><p>"No, it'll be alright, maybe it will still work. C'mon, let's light this pop stand, or however it goes." Doofenshmirtz attached the last piece and hit the ON button. Like before, there was a malfunction and nothing happened.</p><p>"Hmm, well, it seems that I've been thwarted yet again by a platypus," Doofenshmirtz remarked. "If I had a nickel for every time that happened…"</p>
<hr/><p>"Step one," the Doofenshmirtz in the white lab coat was explaining, "press this button. Step two, stand back in awe." He pressed the button, but to his dismay, the circuit overloaded and nothing happened. "Aww," he sighed.</p><p>"That's it?" The Doofenshmirtz in the black coat exclaimed.</p><p>"Well," the first Doofenshmirtz thought, "now that I think about it, it occurs to me that the working portal those boys and I used to get here is still waiting in your secretary Francis Monogram's parlor. Why don't you just use that one to begin the invasion?"</p><p>"Dummkopf!" The second Doofenshmirtz said as he slapped himself in the forehead. "Why didn't I think of that?" Pulling out a recorder from his pocket, Evil Doofenshmirtz clicked a button and held the device to his mouth. "Note to self," he stated, "My evil deed for tomorrow, fire the indentured executive assistant."</p>
<hr/><p>"We're slowing down, sir!" Isabella informed her leader.</p><p>"Keep it on the floor!"</p><p>"It's on the floor! There's too much track, sir, I don't think we're gonna make it!"</p><p>Other dimension Candace turned to the group in the back. "Everyone, to the front now! We're gonna have to cut loose these carts—." At that moment, the mine cart erupted in flames, preventing the four inter-dimensional visitors from crossing safely into the front.</p><p>"The motor's overheating!" Isabella warned from ahead.</p><p>Other dimension Candace quickly considered her options. She didn't like it, but she couldn't let them be the cause of her brothers being captured by Emperor Doofenshmirtz. "Sorry guys, you're on your own," she said, gritting her teeth. Using her staff, she smashed off the metal pin that connected the carts. As she and her crew of resistance members started pulling away, she reached into her hip-pouch. "Phineas, catch!" Candace pulled out the remote for the Other-dimensionator and threw it across the fire for them to escape with.</p><p>"Alright, you guys," Phineas told Ferb, Candace, and Perry, "looks like we're going the long way around." Before the Normbots could catch them, they jumped through the portal and away to safety.</p>
<hr/><p>"Hope you've got your 3-D glasses, cause I'm comin' atcha!" Doofenshmirtz cackled. His robot essence winded back and thrust out with its fist.</p><p>"Hey!" A voice called out and the robot slammed to a halt mere inches away from the kids.</p><p>"What?" Evil Doofenshmirtz asked, annoyed.</p><p>"I just wanted to get something straight," the other Doofenshmirtz said. "First off, where did that giant robot you are in even come from? I know for a fact it isn't one of mine."</p><p>"I thought this would be obvious," Evil Doofenshmirtz replied. "Clearly I have been saving it this whole time, just in case my robot army failed."</p><p>"Okay, I'll suspend my disbelief on that one, but what about this rising platform you used as your big flashy entrance? How'd you build that so quickly? I mean, this is <em>my</em> apartment, and I don't remember installing anything like that. Plus, there's the fact that it is a <em>giant</em> robot, and the portal is only <em>medium</em> sized; even without taking into account how tenuous the portal is when traveling through dimensions counter-clockwise, that doesn't seem to add up. Remember what happened to the Goozim?"</p><p>"Oh, for badness' sake," Evil Doofenshmirtz responded, "we can hash all this out later after I have defeated you all!" Turning back to the kids, he pulled back again to finally wipe them out, when suddenly something huge climbed onto the roof and caught the punch before it impacted. Everyone turned to see what had saved them and were stunned to see a giant robotic version of Ferb, with Ferb himself operating it from the kneecap.</p><p>"Go, Ferb!" Phineas yelled, just realizing it was an inflatable Ferb that was standing blankly next to him. The Ferbo-bot sliced through the air with a powerful karate chop, severing the arm in which Evil Doofenshmirtz was operating the control system.</p><p>Everyone cheered as Other-dimension Monogram and the resistance girls appeared from the portal to apprehend Doofenshmirtz.</p><p>"Man, this has been the greatest day ever!" Phineas exclaimed. Turning to Perry, he said, "Imagine how much fun we can have together now that we know you're a secret agent!"</p><p>"Yes, yes, the next fifteen minutes should be a real hoot," first dimension Monogram said from somewhere off screen.</p><p>"Hey look, it's Carl and Carl's dad!" Phineas said, quickly recognizing the both of them. "Were you guys standing over there watching this whole time?"</p>
<hr/><p>"Boy, it sure was lucky that Dr. D. had a closet full of sports equipment laying around. I never thought of him as being the athletic type," Phineas was telling the others.</p><p>"Um, Major Monogram," Isabella interrupted, raising her hand.</p><p>"Uh, yes?"</p><p>"So, none of us will remember <em>any</em> of today?"</p><p>"That's right."</p><p>"Good!" With that, Isabella grabbed Phineas' shoulders and kissed him. Just as quickly she released him and shouted, "Hit it, Carl!"</p><p>"Isabella!" Phineas cried with a startled but somewhat pleased look on his face. "Wait, wait, wait!" He shouted, but it was no use as Carl fired the Memory Erasinator. Thinking quickly, Phineas jumped out of the way at the last second.</p><p>"What happened, where are we?" Jeremy asked, confused. "What am I doing in this scene when I wasn't there for any part of the movie?"</p><p>"Why's Perry wearing a hat?" Isabella asked.</p><p>"Oh, for crying out loud!" Monogram exclaimed. "Carl, fire it up again. And Agent P, would you please go hide behind something?"</p><p>"I have a better idea," Phineas said. He reached into his pocket to pull out a convenient hand mirror at the moment Carl fired the Memory Erasinator, reflecting the flash back at Carl and Major Monogram.</p><p>In his high-pitched voice, Carl asked, "Whoa, why am I sitting at the control desk for Doofenshmirtz's Amnesia-inator?"</p><p>"Carl, what time is it?" Monogram asked, inspecting his watch. "And what are we supposed to be doing right now?"</p><p>"Now that that's taken care of," Phineas said, "Isabella! I didn't know you had a crush on me!"</p><p>Isabella gasped. "Oh my gosh, am I dreaming?"</p><p>"You're not dreaming. Your memory was just wiped moments ago; but here, I can give you a brief recap." Phineas then did the same thing, grabbing Isabella and kissing her back. Phineas reached out to take her by the hand and led a very happy Isabella out of the room, leaving the rest of the group confused and stunned.</p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! And by the way, I don't own Phineas and Ferb or the website 'how it should have ended.' In fact, I don't own anything except the computer I typed this on!</strong>
</p>
<hr/><p>"This boy's a secret agent?"</p><p>"No, not him!"</p><p>"The quiet one?"</p><p>"No!"</p><p>"This plant?"</p><p>"No."</p><p>"The skeleton?"</p><p>"No."</p><p>"The desk?"</p><p>"No."</p><p>"The chair?"</p><p>"No."</p><p>"His aglet?"</p><p>"No, no, NO!"</p><p>There was a pause as Doofenshmirtz thought carefully.</p><p>"The ceiling fan?"</p><p>...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Night of the Living Pharmacists</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Doof zombie had the two men cornered with no chance of escape. "Lots of me…" groaned the pharmacist.</p><p>"What do we do?" Joachin Phoenix asked the other man.</p><p>"I heard a theory," responded Mel Gibson. "I heard they don't like water."</p><p>"Water, huh? That's a dumb theory. I mean, water is like one of the most abundant elements in the universe, why would they have that as a weakness?"</p><p>"I know, right? It pretty much goes against all the logic that formulates the theory of evolution. Just try it! Here, I've got a glass of water conveniently located right here in my hand!"</p><p>"Thanks," Joachin Phoenix said, taking the glass. "And I've got a baseball bat here; I'll just smash the glass and spray water all over it!" Just as he said, he lobbed the glass a little into the air in front of him and swung the bat mightily at the glass like a baseball. Water flecks flew all over the Doof zombie, and in a flash of static it transformed back into its original host's self.</p><p>"I still say this makes no sense at all," Simon Pegg told the camera.</p><p>At that moment, Brad Pitt arrived. "Guys! I found the solution! We should all inject ourselves with a deadly strain of meningitis, then the zombies will leave us alone! See, watch!" Taking a hypodermic needle, he stabbed it into his arm and injected the solution.</p><p>A Doof zombie came along, and Brad Pitt walked over to it. "Not so scary now, are you?" He began, but the pharmacist reached out and touched him, causing him to convulse from the electrostatic shock. "Oh crud, this didn't happen in the book! I've been—gahhh! Lots of me…"</p><p>
  <strong>How Night of the Living Pharmacists Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><hr/><p>"Well, it was just a simple Repulse-inator," Doofenshmirtz was explaining, "you know, to make Roger <em>ugly,</em> but then there was some sort of power surge and this happened!"</p><p>"Well, that explains the electrostatic charge that's changing everybody," thought Phineas, "but we need some sort of conductor that neutralizes it."</p><p>Isabella had the answer. "Well, water neutralizes static."</p><p>"Yes! Water should change everyone back!" exclaimed Phineas. "But we've gotta find a way to get everyone in Danville wet at once, otherwise the contagion could start again."</p><p>"We can wait till it rains," suggested Isabella.</p><p>"Ugh, but we don't have time!" Candace insisted. "And when does it ever rain here?"</p><p>Phineas and Ferb glanced at each other. "Actually, Ferb and I discovered the trick to summoning instant rain at a moment's notice earlier this summer."</p><p>"You guys learned how to control the weather?" asked Candace.</p><p>Phineas shook his head. "Not control the weather, no; just how to make it rain. Remember, Isabella?"</p><p>A light bulb went off in the Fireside Patrol Leader's head. "Of course!" she exclaimed in awe at how simple the answer really was.</p><p>There was a camera wipe. Now everyone in the group was holding various instruments. Ferb had a bagpipe, Isabella some drums.</p><p>"Alright, everybody," directed Phineas, "one, two, three!</p><p>'<em>E's a fishmonger, and 'e flies.<br/>'E's a fishmonger, and 'e flies."</em></p><p>Together the group sang the monotone song, and immediately thunderclouds gathered over the gloomy setting. In an instant the floodgates opened, pouring rain all over the city. Thousands of Doof zombies were pelted by the falling water, transforming the people back into their regular selves.</p><p>"Wow," remarked Doofenshmirtz, "I can't believe that actually worked! But you know what I don't understand, how did you kids get those musical instruments so fast?"</p><p>"How did you get that helicopter so fast?" replied Vanessa.</p><p>"I don't know." Doofenshmirtz thought for a moment. "But wait, you weren't even in that scene! You shouldn't know about that."</p><p>"You weren't in the scene where Buford said, 'what's shakin', bacon?'" Phineas pointed out.</p><p>"Touché."</p><hr/><p>"Isabella, are you okay?" asked Phineas.</p><p>"Yeah, just a little foggy," said a frizzy-haired Isabella.</p><p>"What happened?"</p><p>"I remember building the vortex sprayer, but, after that I've got no clue."</p><p>"Me neither, but whatever happened, it worked."</p><p>Ferb climbed atop the water tower to join them. "Hold on," he questioned in his British accent. "I can remember everything. I even remember trying to infect you both while you were busy jeopardizing the mission by sharing your feelings for each other."</p><p>"I know," Phineas said, reaching out to hold hands with his new girlfriend. "We were just messing with ya."</p><p>"Gotcha!" Isabella added, resting her head on Phineas' shoulder as they turned to watch the sunrise.</p><p>"We even remember meeting Vanessa's dad after he crash landed in that helicopter," said Phineas. "See? There they are, over there with Candace. Hi Candace! Hi Vanessa and Vanessa's dad," he waved.</p><p>They waved back.</p><p>"Good thing Dr. D decided to put his clothes back on," Isabella noted.</p><p>"Yeah," agreed Phineas. "And look, that weird platypus-slash-pharmacist zombie was actually Perry! Hi Perry!"</p><p>Perry waved back, then remembered he still had his fedora on.</p><p>"Oh, great," said Monogram, as he and Carl appeared on the watertower beside the children. "Agent P, your cover's been blown again! Now we have no choice but to erase your memories!"</p><p>"But Phineas and I are finally together!" Isabella protested.</p><p>"Too bad! We have to preserve the continuity until <em>Act Your Age.</em> Carl, you know what to do!"</p><p>"Yes sir," saluted the intern. A large mechanical contraption facing the kids flashed brightly.</p><p>Phineas, Ferb, and Isabella groggily blinked their eyes a few times. "What happened?" asked Phineas. "Where are we? And why am I holding hands with Isabella?"</p><p>"And why are we all wet?" added the Fireside Girl.</p><p>Before any of their questions could be answered, Irving arrived using the metal rungs that had magically reappeared since being uprooted by the vortex sprayer. "Hi guys," he greeted. "Don't worry, I've got the whole thing on film!" He held out his laptop and pressed the play button to show the others.</p><p>"<em>I like you!" Isabella shouted above the din of the pharmacists.</em></p><p>"<em>I like you too, Isabella!" responded Phineas, looking up from his work on the vortex sprayer.</em></p><p>"<em>No! I mean I </em>like you <em>like you!"</em></p><p>The Phineas standing on the watertower gasped. "I remember everything!" Turning to his soon-to-be-renewed girlfriend, he dropped down on one knee. "Can we be together forever and ever and ever?"</p><p>"Oh my gosh, Phineas! Yes!" squealed Isabella.</p><p>Irving squealed louder. "The fans are gonna go nuts when they see this Phinabella moment!" he told nobody in particular. "And I got it all on my camera!" He pounced back on the rungs to descend back to ground level. "I gotta post this on my blog pronto!"</p><p>The attention shifted back to the love birds. "So, Phineas," asked Isabella, "what are we gonna do today?"</p><p>Before he could answer, they were interrupted yet again by two full-grown men.</p><p>"Greetings, Phineas, Ferb, Isabella," one of the men said in a serious tone. "I'm Agent Povenmire and this is my partner, Agent Marsh."</p><p>"We're from a top secret government division known as the Dudes in Blue," said Agent Marsh.</p><p>"We're sorry it has to be like this," Agent Povenmire continued, "but we can't allow you to keep your memories after today, so we're gonna have to wipe them."</p><p>As he said it, the both of them chicly whipped out a set of identical blue sunglasses and placed them on their noses. Agent Marsh held up a tiny laser-like device the size of a pen.</p><p>"But Phineas and I are finally together!" Isabella protested.</p><p>"Too bad! We have to preserve the continuity until <em>Act Your Age,</em>" Agent Marsh informed them.</p><p>"You can at least take some pleasure in knowing that you two are together in a galaxy far, far away," Agent Povenmire added as an afterthought. "Though, technically, none of that is canon."</p><p>There was another blinding flash. The edges of the television screen became apparent as the movie ended and turned to a blizzard of pixelated static.</p><p>Isabella, who sat snuggled up next to Phineas on the couch, clicked the remote, turning the TV off. "Pff. Horror movies. Scary, but so unbelievable."</p><p>"You said it, sugar," stretched Phineas. "So, do you wanna, like, make out and stuff, now?"</p><p>Isabella put the clicker down. "Okay."</p><p>The End? <em>*BUM!*</em></p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! I do not own Phineas and Ferb or How It Should Have Ended. Coming soon: Mission Marvel!</strong>
</p><hr/><p>"There it is!" exclaimed Isabella, pointing at the remains of the Repulse-inator. "That must be where the ray came from!"</p><p>"It sure doesn't look like it could produce any electrostatic rays," said Phineas upon closer inspection.</p><p>"That's because it kinda exploded after the power surge," explained Doofenshmirtz.</p><p>"Okay," Phineas said, "so if this machine exploded, shouldn't the ray's effect have worn off afterwards? I mean, that's pretty much how things go in every other episode. It seems to me that none of this should have even happened!"</p><p>"Hmm," replied Vanessa, "that's a good point. I guess my dad's inators only continue to work after they get destroyed when we're in a special."</p><p>"Well, at least Phineas didn't get mad at anyone this time," commented one of the Doof zombies in Buford's voice. "Those scenes always annoy me."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Mission Marvel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Passetic!" The Red Skull's anger for the superheroes caused his notoriously thick German accent to manifest itself once more. "Look at how you've vasted your lives! Protecting zese humans, who are so quick to abandon you in your hour of need!"</p><p>With a flick of his wrists, Whiplash tossed Iron Man high into the air like a rag doll.</p><p>"Whiplash!" The Red Skull rounded on his henchman.</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"I vas talking zu him!"</p><p>"Sorry."</p><p>Red Skull didn't wait for Iron Man to arc and fall back to earth to carry on his monolog. "Look around you! Now zat you have no powers, you have no friends! No allies! You have nossing!"</p><p>Gravity's relentlessness asserted itself upon the billionaire's suit, and just when it seemed as though nothing would stop his fall, Baljeet flew out of nowhere and caught the superhero, with strength granted him by the Gamma radiation exposure of earlier that afternoon. "We have a Baljeet," Iron Man pointed out while Baljeet clawed at the side of a building to slow their descent.</p><p>"<em>Hulk</em>-jeet!"</p><p>"Oh, my bad," responded Iron Man with a shrug. "Apparently he prefers to be known as 'Hulk-jeet'." As soon as Hulk-jeet landed and put Iron Man down, the Beak crashed into the tree behind them. "And—this thing…"</p><p>"Bu-kaw!" called Phineas, from inside the suit.</p><p>"I think it's a bird? It's with us too," Iron Man declared. The Beak extracted itself from the branches of the tree.</p><p>Agent P, in his colorful disguise, zoomed in to join them as well. "The flying duck with a beaver tail, we got him," Iron Man counted.</p><p>"No matter," Red Skull said with a glare. "Vissout your powers, zis is just a costume party."</p><p>"Did someone say party?"</p><p>Without warning, an arrow embedded itself into the side of a building across the street. Hawkeye slid down the string connected to it and landed in the midst of the heroes. "How come nobody invited me?" he asked the other Avengers while nocking an arrow in his bow.</p><p>"Nice timing, Legolas," quipped Iron Man. Turning to face Red Skull, he added, "There we go, an expert marksman, we got him."</p><p>"And I brought a few friends," Hawkeye announced.</p><p>"Romanov, reporting for duty." Black Widow emerged from her hiding spot to take a fighting stance with the others.</p><p>"The Avengers always fight together!" declared Ant Man as he grew into a size they could see.</p><p>"I'm here, too!" The Wasp, only discernable now as a glowing ball of light, was heard to say.</p><p>Captain America landed strapped to a parachute in their midst. "Avengers, assemble!" He unlatched the parachute by the strings and drew his signature shield. With him, Ms. Marvel, Black Panther, Iron Patriot, and the Vision joined the ranks of the Avengers as well. "Cease and desist at once, Red Skull! You cannot win!"</p><p>"What was that you were saying about having no friends or no powers?" Iron Man asked. More superheroes appeared in droves as the billionaire genius listed them off. "Let's see, there's the X-men, the Fantastic Four, the Guardians of the Galaxy—"</p><p>"I am Groot," a humongous walking tree declared.</p><p>"Not to mention—Squirrel Girl!" Squirrel Girl leaped into the fray; a couple of the Marvel characters facepalmed.</p><p>"Who let <em>her</em> come?" someone whispered.</p><p>The Red Skull was astonished. "I do not understand! I sot zese heroes had all lost zeir powers! Zis is all your fault, Doofenshmirtz!"</p><p>"Hey! Things were going smoothly when I was in charge," the evil scientist called from above.</p><p>
  <strong>How Phineas and Ferb: Mission Marvel Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><hr/><p>"Aren't you a little young to be stealing superheroes' superpowers?"</p><p>"Yes, yes we would be, Spiderman," Phineas replied, "if we actually did it. But like I said, I don't think we did."</p><p>"Well, the power-siphoning ray originated in the Tri-State Area," explained Iron Man, "and I was thinking you guys would know something about it since it bounced off <em>your</em> space station."</p><p>"Are you sure it was our space station?" asked Phineas.</p><p>Hulk said merely, "It was shaped like your head."</p><p>"Well, that sounds like ours, but I don't know anything about a power-siphoning ray."</p><p>"Can you just go to your space station and double-check?" Iron Man asked. "I mean, that is what we came here for. Nick Fury didn't just send us here to hang out with a couple of kids until the super villains find out we've lost our powers."</p><p>
  <em>Five Minutes Later…</em>
</p><p>"Hey, look everybody!" Phineas exclaimed as he and Ferb returned to the house through their front door. "The data collection tanks have the heroes' powers right here!"</p><p>"All right, boys and girls, listen up," Candace bossily announced her presence as she came down the stairs. "Mom's on a walking tour of Danville and Dad's tinkering in the basement, so I'm in charge. That means no shenanigans. Hey, Spiderman. So, I'll be at Stacy's all d-d-d-day?" Candace stopped and stared as her brain caught up to what her mouth was saying.</p><p>"S'up?" Spiderman waved.</p><p>Candace screamed. "You guys have five fingers? That is <em>seriously</em> creepy!"</p><hr/><p>AND FINALLY…</p><p>The doors to the space station opened, and there stood Candace and Isabella with the canister. "Hey heroes, got a little something for ya!" A slight shove with her foot sent the canister rolling down to the battle field.</p><p>"Candace!" Phineas shouted, realizing that she'd figured it out. "The data collection tank! Of course!"</p><p>"Great job!" acknowledged Spiderman. "Somebody's using their spider-sense."</p><p>"I learned from the best, Spidey!"</p><p>With the simple press of a button, Phineas and Ferb activated the canister, and in a flash of light the powers were released back to their original owners. The day was saved!</p><p>
  <em>Later…</em>
</p><p>It was the end of the day. At a nearby café, Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and Isabella sat at a booth along with Superman and Batman.</p><p>"And that's how it all ended," Phineas told the DC characters, who listened raptly to his story. "The real heroes were Candace and Isabella! If it wasn't for them, Spiderman, Thor, Hulk, and Iron Man might have never gotten their powers back, and we'd have probably lost the fight."</p><p>"So, did you ever find out who the mysterious platypus was?" Batman asked in his gravelly voice.</p><p>"Yeah, turned out it was—"</p><p>"Ducky Momo!" Candace enthusiastically interrupted, throwing her arms victoriously into the air. "It was Ducky Momo all along!"</p><p>"Okay, that is, like, seriously messed up," commented Superman. "Too bad you didn't call me, though, since I basically have, like, all of their superpowers in one."</p><p>"What if the Power-Drain-inator had taken away your powers, though?" Batman asked.</p><p>"Pft, c'mon. We all know that couldn't happen, right?" Superman responded with a wave of his hand. "First off, I'd hear the ray coming with my super hearing, then I'd use my super speed to get out of the way. Plus, it probably wouldn't even affect me anyways, unless the beam had traces of Kryptonite, or something. What about you, Mr. Utility Belt? What would you have done?"</p><p>"Oh, well actually, it wouldn't affect me, either."</p><p>"Why? Because you don't have any superpowers to lose?" Kal El said with a smirk.</p><p>"No, because I'M BATMAN!"</p><p>Superman pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "Right. Okay, here's my question." He looked at Candace. "What on earth compelled you to push that red button when you were on your brothers' space station?"</p><p>"Well," Candace answered, "you know, I just had a gut feeling."</p><p>"A gut feeling?"</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>"You had 'a gut feeling' tell you to push an ominous looking red button when you had no clue what its function was—in a satellite full of buttons that, again, you had no idea what their functions were—and you thought it would somehow zap the heroes with their powers again? Am I understanding your train of thought correctly?"</p><p>"Well…" Candace tried, "there was some red detailing on that collector thing…"</p><p>"She's got a point there," inserted Batman.</p><p>"You're not helping," the Kryptonian snapped. "Look, let me put it this way. The earth's total surface area is 197 million square miles. And the space station shaped like Phineas and Ferbs' heads crashed, from orbit, into the <em>exact spot</em> where Red Skull and his minions were standing, thereby preventing them from disintegrating the Tri-State Area, yada yada. Tell me that isn't highly convenient."</p><p>"I told you it was a highly irrational deduction," Isabella frowned.</p><p>"Batman," Superman looked across the table, "in your experience, do most people push ominous looking red buttons when they don't know what they do?"</p><p>"Most people do not push ominous looking red buttons when they don't know what they do," Batman replied. "Everybody knows those are usually self-destruct buttons."</p><p>"Oh, actually, we don't use those sorts of things," Phineas insisted. "You're thinking of Dr. D."</p><p>"All we're saying," Superman suggested, "is that it shouldn't have worked. You were lucky it didn't miss the supervillains by about ten feet and crush all the superheroes instead!"</p><p>"Not even Wayne Enterprise's guided missiles have that kind of precision," Batman inserted. "So much for that whole feminist sentiment you kept alluding to in that song. You know, the one with the fancy harmony."</p><p>"But it worked, didn't it?" Candace returned with spunk.</p><p>"Uh, sure," Superman said. "Just, don't try to make it sound like girl power was the answer. You didn't do a very good job of representing the empowerment of your gender. My advice, get some tips from Isabella in Star Wars next time, or even the Candace in the Second Dimension."</p><p>At that moment, Hulk-jeet appeared behind the café window. Everyone watched as he smashed several cars and pulled a subway out a crack in the road he created with his own smashing.</p><p>"And what's the deal with Baljeet? Does this mean he'll always have a Hulk inside him, from now on?"</p><p>"<em>Hulk-jeet smash!</em>" could be heard through the din outside.</p><p>"Maybe the same rule as the Star Wars crossover applies to all crossovers," Phineas stated, looking a little irritated. "None of this is canon, so <em>relax already!</em>"</p><p>Everyone went quiet for a second, waiting to see if Phineas was going to yell again. Finally, Batman said, "Well, it was a good thing that ray hit Baljeet instead of Phineas. Otherwise, Phineas would've turned into a Hulk in every special from here on."</p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! If you liked, remember to favorite, follow, and review! I don't own Phineas and Ferb or How It Should Have Ended!</strong>
</p><hr/><p>As soon as he was alone in the cafe with Superman again, Batman started singing dramatically.</p><p>"<em>Only trying to help!<br/>(I'm only trying to help out!)<br/>Only trying to help!<br/></em>C'mon, sing it with me, Supe's!"</p><p>"Please stop," Superman said, rubbing his temples as if he were developing a migraine.</p><p>"<em>I'm only trying to he-eh-el, el-el-elp!</em> But it's so catchy!"</p><p>"At least don't use that weird voice when you sing. You sound like you're gargling marbles."</p><p>"Because I'm Batman!"</p><p>"Outta my way, you weirdos!" an old lady said in passing.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Last Day of Summer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The rift opened overhead, and Candace, Baljeet, Buford and Isabella dropped into existence behind Phineas.</p><p>"Hi, guys!" Phineas exclaimed, relief showing all over his face. "So good to see you!"</p><p>Isabella looked at him and gasped. "Huh?!" A flow of memories rushed through her head, reminding her of the love she had for the boy of her dreams. "Phineas!"</p><p>
  <em>Dunneladunneladunneladunneladunneladunnela—HAAA-AAH-AH-AHHH, AHH, AH-AHH!</em>
</p><p>"Hi, Phineas," blushed Isabella.</p><p>Baljeet looked down at the ground and gasped. "Spoon!"</p><p>
  <em>Dunneladunneladunneladunneladunneladunnela—HAAA-AAH-AH-AHHH, AHH, AH-AHH!</em>
</p><p>"Oh, how I have missed spoons," Baljeet said, hugging his spoon.</p><p>Buford looked at the object lying next to him. "Orange," he said, inspecting it closely. "Eh, not really getting a big rush of emotions over this."</p><p>"And here are the Capri pants," Candace pointed out.</p><p>Buford gasped. "Capris!"</p><p>
  <em>Dunneladunneladunneladunneladunneladunnela—HAAA-AAH-AH-AHHH, AHH, AH-AHH!</em>
</p><p>The bully glanced up from the pair of Capris he was holding tightly. "What?" he asked, noticing the others' suspicious looks. "Can't a guy appreciate the rare moments where fashion meets convenience?"</p><p>
  <strong>How Last Day of Summer Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><hr/><p>Candace's phone rang. "Sorry, Stacy," Candace hurriedly answered, already knowing who it was and why she was calling. "I know it's the last day of summer, but we can't hang out right now. Vanessa's dad—did you know he's a pharmacist?—made a machine thingy that made me re-do the day and now I get a second chance to bust my brothers and I don't have time to hang out because I need to take advantage of this opportunity while I still can and nachos."</p><p>"But I wanna be in the finale," whined Stacy.</p><p>"Oh, there they are!" Candace interrupted, looking out the window at the ride Phineas and Ferb were making. "Gotta go, bye!"</p><p>Stacy gave her phone a suspicious look. "Did she say something about a machine built by a pharmacist?" she asked aloud. "It might be nothing, but I better double-check with Perry."</p><p>
  <em>One scene wipe later…</em>
</p><p>"And she said something about being affected by a pharmacist's machine," Stacy finished explaining to Perry, who stood before her crowned with his fedora. "Just thought you might want to know. Also, it seemed like she knew exactly what I was going to say before I said it. It's like she's stuck in a time loop, or something."</p><p>The platypus's paw was massaging his duck-beak in thought, recreating what he saw and heard while eating breakfast that morning. <em>"Looks like the zoo's got a new tiger habitat," Linda mentioned. Lawrence growled in response while Candace wheeled into the dining room on a wagon. "Morning, Candace."</em></p><p>"<em>Mm-hm," was all she received in return. "And so begins the last day of summer—again!" She pointed at Perry. "Which means back-to-school errands for me, and making the most of the day for you!" Both women said it in sync. "</em>Hey<em>!"</em></p><p>
  <em>Candace stood with renewed vigor. "This is amazing; today is exactly the same as yesterday! It's repeating!"</em>
</p><p>The secret agent gasped in realization. Without another word, he blasted off for Doofenshmirtz's.</p><p>
  <em>One more scene wipe later…</em>
</p><p>Perry crashed out of the drum, broke his way out of the skull, and was ferris-wheeled into a steel cage.</p><p>"Haha! I can see by the confused and somewhat annoyed look on your face that your little mammal brain is working overtime trying to figure out how I anticipated your every move," Doofenshmirtz said. "Not to mention, the purpose of this hamster ball. Well, it's simple. See, this protects me from when you eventually escape from that; like that! But you can't punch, kick, or otherwise bruise me, because I'm safe inside my—wait, Perry the Platypus, where are you going?"</p><p>Agent P inspected the Tri-Governor-Inator and moved past it.</p><p>"Hello, Perry the Platypus? I'm over here!"</p><p>Paying no heed, the secret agent spotted the Do-Over-Inator lying in plain sight and pressed the self-destruct button.</p><p>Stacy, who was watching nearby, soliloquized, "Man, it sure was a good thing I learned Perry's secret so we could do stuff like this, am I right?"</p><hr/><p>
  <em>OR…</em>
</p><p>The gang crashed through the rift into the backyard while the Do-Over-Inator bounced across the lawn. "Is everyone okay?" Phineas asked.</p><p>"Aww," sounded Buford, "my muffins got smashed."</p><p>Candace jumped up and ran for the Do-Over-Inator. "C'mon, no time to lose! Literally!"</p><p>Everyone gathered around the device. "Okay, Baljeet, just to confirm; destroying the machine will put the space-time continuum back to normal."</p><p>"Yes. But we need to do it quickly. The time loops are accelerating exponentially—"</p><p>Time looped, and the gang crashed into the backyard again.</p><p>"Oh man," Buford said, pushing himself up. "That was quick."</p><p>"The days must be compressing to this exact moment!" Phineas exclaimed.</p><p>"Wait a second," Candace said, stopping. "I thought <em>I</em> was the only one outside the time loop?"</p><p>Time looped, and the gang crashed into the backyard again.</p><p>"The time loop is getting too short!" Phineas cried in exasperation. "We can't reach it, there's just not enough time! Oh, now I really wish we'd built a giant, floating theme park in the sky for today's project instead!"</p><hr/><p>
  <em>But this is really how it should have ended…</em>
</p><p>Candace sighed guiltily and explained herself. "When I was at Vanessa's, I may have accidentally/intentionally pushed the button." Everyone but Ferb gasped.</p><p>"Okay, I was having a rotten day—one crummy thing after another kept happening, and when he told me that this thing could make the day start over again, I just couldn't help myself. And then the days just kept looping and I know I should have said something sooner but I kept coming so close to busting you guys! And I swear I had no idea it would do any of this. I thought I got one do-over, and that would be that, then I saw it was creating problems and making things disappear and making people forget about it and by the time I was trying to stop it it was too late and I lost you guys! And I don't know how to fix it! And I know it's a special extended episode and Phineas always yells at me in those, so I—"</p><p>"GET ON THE TRIKE!" shouted Phineas angrily, for no apparent reason.</p><p>"See, just like that."</p><p>Buford pulled the Inator closer. "Well, if this thing's the problem, maybe we should push this big self-destruct button."</p><p>"No!" Baljeet slammed the lid shut. "If time stops looping, there will be no big tears in the fabric of space-time, and no way for us to get home! We must find a way to get ourselves—and the machine—through one of the rifts and back into Danville. <em>Then</em> we can push the button and blow up the machine."</p><p>"I call pressing the button," Buford announced.</p><p>"Come on, gang, we know what we have to do today," Phineas said. "Or, should I say, we know what we have to do-<em>over</em> today, with this machine<em>—</em>we'll use it the same way Candace did to do-over today, and go over to Vanessa's dad's first thing this morning to destroy it!"</p><p>"Agreed," everyone said.</p><p>"That sounds way better than running from these tigers," Buford added, as he pushed the little square button opposite the self-destruct button.</p><p>A bubble in the pocket of the space-time continuum formed around the gang.</p><p>"Hey, Baljeet," Phineas asked, "just out of curiosity, when we wake up, how much time will we have before time loops again?"</p><p>"Oh, plenty," said the Indian boy with a cursory wave of his hand. "Like, at least enough to build a catapult, if we wanted."</p><p>Time looped, and everyone woke up in their beds in Danville. Within minutes, six hoverboards had arrived at the top floor of Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated, and the kids destroyed the machine while Candace explained the whole thing to Vanessa and her father.</p><p>And everyone lived happily ever after.</p><p>...</p><p>
  <em>Doofenshmirtz saw the error in his ways and defected to good, choosing to become a high school science teacher. Phineas and Ferb became his favorite students.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Candace, also seeing the error of her ways, decided to give up busting. She now enjoys jig-saw puzzles and playing Canasta with her friends.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Perry was able to enjoy an early retirement and spent the rest of his days in peace, with his family. Stacy is still the only one who knows his secret.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Baljeet graduated college early and became a professor. Buford still gives him occasional wedgies.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Vanessa decided working at OWCA wasn't for her when she fell in love with Ferb. After receiving a substantial inheritance from Charlene, there was no need for either of them to work ever again, so now they travel the world seeking adventure.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>For a heart-wrenching ten teen years, Isabella and Phineas inexplicably never once asked each other out. They got all sad and sang a song about it, then started dating in college.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh were so successful with their rockin' new show, Mikey Murphy's Law, that Disney begged them to do a fifth season of Phineas and Ferb and that live action movie they'd always talked about. They did, and it blew all our minds.</em>
</p><p>The End!</p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! If you liked, be sure to favorite, follow, and most importantly, review! All onomatopoeias are credited to The WGPM, and I do not own Phineas and Ferb or How It Should Have Ended!</strong>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Phineas and Ferb Star Wars</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>A couple of years ago in a youtube video far, far away… A Star Wars Episode IV HISHE was already made. Behold!</strong>
</p><p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXUJiHut7YE">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXUJiHut7YE</a>
</p><p>
  <strong>And that pretty much says it all.</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>But, due to the sheer number of fans asking for it, and mostly because I was in a Star Wars mood after seeing The Force Awakens, here it is, the HISHE you've all been waiting for. DUN! Dun dun dun. Dun dun dun, doo-doo-doo, singing the opening Star Wars fanfare, doo-doo-doo-doo, dum dum dum. Bum! Bum! Duh-duh-duh! Duh! Dun! Duh-duh-duh! Duh! Dun! Duh-duh duh-duh! And we're starting now!</strong>
</p><p>With his evil brother distracted by that Stormtrooper girl with red hair, Phineas charged for the Sith-Inator. Darth Ferb noticed and leapt to block his way, causing Phineas to stumble backwards onto his backside. Candace, realizing she still had the socks in her pouch, stuffed them with the blocks of rubble littering the floor.</p><p>"Ferb, please, stop!" Phineas held up his hands, pleading.</p><p>Just as Ferb was preparing to strike, he was hit by a very hard sock. Then another.</p><p>"Now I really wish I'd bought the three-pack," cringed Candace, who was now out of ammunition.</p><p>Seizing his opportunity, Phineas hurled his crumpled lightsaber over Ferb's head.</p><p>Ferb, realizing what he had done, stretched out a hand. "Nice try!" The lightsaber pulled to a stop in midair, hovering just inches above the Self-Destruct-Port. Ferb flicked his wrist, and the lightsaber flew harmlessly across the room.</p><p>"Oh, yeah, I forgot you could use the Force," Phineas gulped.</p><p>"Now, you will all join me on the Dark Side!"</p><p>"Yay, just what I wanted!" Darthenshmirtz cheered, despite being encased in Carbonite.</p><p>"Except that guy," Ferb added.</p><p>"Aww," Darthenshmirtz groaned.</p><p>
  <strong>How Phineas and Ferb: Star Wars Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><hr/><p>Princess Leia inserted the Death Star plans into R2-D2's blue slot. "Agent P," she said, placing a hand on her trusted agent's shoulder, "I need you to make sure this R2 unit goes to Obi-Wan Kenobi on Tatooine." She bent down to make sure R2 was ready. "But first, I need to record a video message. Be a dear, and stand over there behind the bulkhead—you're kinda in my shot."</p><p>Agent P stood there, just looking at the princess.</p><p>"You're—not moving," Leia observed. "What is it, Agent P?"</p><p>He pointed at R2, a dubious look on his face.</p><p>"Yes, R2 is delivering the Death Star plans." Upon seeing the questioning look Perry gave, she elaborated. "Because only R2 can playback my message—you don't have a hologram projector."</p><p>The rebel platypus pulled back his sleeve, and Major Hologram shined up out of his wristwatch to greet them. "Oh, hello, Princess," the Major said. "I see Agent P has delivered the plans for the—." He covered the projection back up, cutting off the Major's last words.</p><p>"Oh, I guess you do have a hologram projector…" Leia, now less certain of herself, tried, "but, I still need R2 to do this. If they detect no life forms on it, maybe the Star Destroyer won't shoot down the escape pod."</p><p>The astromech droid beeped and whistled noisily.</p><p>"Yeah," Princess Leia agreed, "I don't think the Empire would really be that stupid, either."</p><p>In a cutaway, an imperial gunner and his commander watched an escape pod fly past the window. "Hold your fire," ordered the commander. "There are no life forms on board; it must have short-circuited."</p><p>Inside the escape pod, a trio of bugs named Napoleon, Floyd, and Wendell were unlucky enough to have been accidentally ejected into space while trying to establish contact with the Rebellion. As they screamed and banged at the windows of the escape pod, nobody in the galaxy was the slightest bit aware or concerned.</p><p>Back aboard the ship, Leia continued to rationalize her choice to send the droid to Tatooine. "Oh, don't be a sour pus, Agent P," said she. "R2 may not have any way of protecting himself, he may be slow and clunky, and his electrical wiring might fry in the hot, sandy desert, but I have my full confidence that he can complete the mission. A-and I know that it may seem counter-productive to have you follow him at a distance, not really doing anything, but these are desperate times. This is our last hope."</p><p>Agent P facepalmed. Leia turned to face R2-D2, stretching out her hand to start the recording. "Now, was his name Obi-Wan or Ben Kenobi? I can never remember..."</p><p>
  <em>...FFWD HISHE STORY...</em>
</p><p>"<em>And I'm feelin' so low…</em>" Vanessa the Twi'lek sang her sad song as Phineas and Ferb slipped into the booth across from Isabella.</p><p>"Oh great," said the young pilot, discreetly unstrapping her blaster holster while pretending to pick at the stubble on the wall behind her. "What do you farmboys want?"</p><p>"I'm Phineas, and this is my brother, Ferb. We understand you're a pretty good pilot."</p><p>"For a price," Isabella said, doubting that two farmboys had much money.</p><p>"Well," Phineas began, wondering how much information he could trust this smuggler with. "We have a very—important disc we need to get to someone who just blasted out of Docking Bay 94."</p><p>"I know whose ship that is," Isabella growled.</p><p>"Whose?"</p><p>Isabella squinted her eyes in disgust. "Han Solo."</p><p>"<em>So lo-ow,</em>" Vanessa could still be heard singing in the background.</p><p>"Solo's been a thorn in my side for years," Isabella explained. "My ship, the Centennial Chihuahua, was on pace to finish the Kessel Run in eleven parsecs, and that nerf herder cut me off!"</p><p>"<em>I'm feeling so low!</em>"</p><p>"Everybody loves Solo," ranted Isabella, hardly noticing Vanessa's rising pitch. "Twelve parsecs—if I ever hear his name again, I'll just—!"</p><p>"<em>So low! So low!</em>" Isabella just paused to take notice of the lyrics. "<em>So lo-ow! So low!</em>"</p><p>"Would you two just excuse me?" she requested, quickly pulling out her blaster.</p><p>
  <em>PEW!</em>
</p><p>A groan was heard off-screen, the singing instantly silenced. Isabella smirked and returned her blaster to her waist. "Well, we should probably—what's the matter with your brother?" she asked.</p><p>Phineas turned and looked at Ferb, who was suddenly covered in red and black face paint. His hair was also tousled upwards in a few menacing spikes.</p><p>"Anger—growing," Ferb strained. "Rage—building—Dark side—taking—over…. Rahhh!" Ferb flipped over the table and levelled his Sith-red lightsaber at Isabella. "Don't touch my Vanessa!"</p><p>"Yeah," Vanessa added, rising from her cowering position next to her disintegrated microphone. "And for the record, <em>you</em> shot first!"</p><p>
  <em>...FFWD HISHE STORY...</em>
</p><p>"This is not a <em>friend</em>-ship, it's a <em>space</em>-ship! So don't invade mine!" Isabella stormed back to the cockpit.</p><p>"What do you think, Ferb?" asked Phineas. "A girl like her and a guy like me?"</p><p>Ferb glanced at the cockpit, then back at his brother. "No way, bro!" he answered, animated. "She's been nothing but mean since we met her, and you're nicest guy in the galaxy!" he exclaimed. "You don't stand a bantha's chance in the Sarlacc's stomach!"</p><p>Phineas was mildly stunned by this reaction. "Wow, you sure are talking a lot more than usual."</p><p>"Just wait until later," Ferb replied. "I'll be talking even more."</p><p>
  <em>...FFWD HISHE STORY...</em>
</p><p>"Aha!" Darthenshmirtz declared. "Look, Norm! You see, you put a big, red X on the floor, people will stand on it."</p><p>Admiral Ackbar appeared just before Perry fell into the pit. "IT'S A TRAP!"</p><p>
  <em>...FFWD HISHE STORY...</em>
</p><p>"I found this," Darth Ferb-Maul said, "the Sith-Inator. Join me on the Dark Side, brother."</p><p>The red-head's cheeks puffed full of air in amusement. "Pffff—ha ha ha ha!" Phineas chortled at the silliness of it all.</p><p>"What's so funny?" asked Ferb.</p><p>"You!" answered Phineas. "You hardly ever talk, Darth Maul never talks, but when you combine the two, apparently you talk a lot!"</p><p>"Don't laugh at me!" Ferb disappeared, but was still heard crying in the background. "I'm trying really hard to be evil!"</p><p>
  <em>...FFWD HISHE STORY...</em>
</p><p>"C'mon, let's get off this battle station," Candace suggested urgently.</p><p>"But we don't have a ship!" Phineas protested.</p><p>"I know where there's a bus pod," answered Candace.</p><p>Phineas turned to his old pet as he followed the Stormtrooper. "Perry, great work! Hey, don't be a stranger!"</p><p>Perry whistled with two fingers and pointed over his shoulder.</p><p>"Oh, you have a ship? Great, why don't we just hitch a ride with you?"</p><p>The platypus nodded.</p><p>"C'mon, let's go with Perry!" Phineas said, pulling Candace and the others in the opposite direction.</p><p>Meanwhile, Isabella was searching the empty hallways of the Death Star. "Farmboys?" she called. "Hey, farmboys! Where are you? I overrode all my previous lifestyle choices to come back for you, don't make me regret my decision!"</p><p>Outside, Luke Skywalker's X-Wing delivered a direct hit to the exhaust port with his torpedo. Isabella slumped over at the sight. "Aw, crud..."</p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! I don't own Phineas and Ferb, Star Wars, Phineas and Ferb Star Wars, HISHE, or How Star Wars Episode IV Should Have Ended. If you liked, be sure to review, favorite, and/or follow!</strong>
</p><hr/><p>At the checkout stand, Candace waited impatiently for the store clerk to swipe the socks.</p><p>"Say, aren't you a little short to be a Stormtrooper?" asked the register attendant.</p><p>"No, no I'm not!" Candace flared, pointing a menacing finger. "Shut up, or I'll shoot you in the face!"</p><p>"'Shut up' is a mean word," the cashier murmured.</p><p>"What? I would set it to stun first..."</p><p>The socks were swiped and dropped in a brown paper bag. Candace picked it up and made to move out, but not quickly enough to evade the next question.</p><p>"Aren't you also a little—<em>scrawny</em>—to be a Stormtroooper?"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Act Your Age</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"<em>I could have been your girlfriend,"</em> Isabella lamented in song form.</p><p>"<em>I could have been your fella," </em>Phineas carried on as if he were right there, singing alongside her. He imagined them riding a tandem bicycle together. <em>"We might have been an item—"</em></p><p>"<em>They would have called us 'Phinabella!'"</em> Heart wrenching at the thought, Isabella pictured in her mind watching a beautiful sunset on the beach in Phineas' arms.</p><p>"<em>I would have held the door for you,"</em> Phineas reminisced, <em>"I would have shared my umbrella."</em></p><p>"<em>Something something else contrived that rhymes with Phinabella!" </em>Isabella tried, accidentally forgetting her line.</p><p>"<em>Rhymes with Phinabella!"</em> Her miscue was aptly repeated by her backup singers, her former selves.</p><p>"<em>We could have been together, all you had to say was when!/And though I wanted so much more, I guess you'll always be my friend./What might have been…"</em></p><p>Her car was now passing the sign that read, "You are now leaving Danville (Come Back Soon.)" To Isabella's eyes, it might as well have said, "You are now leaving Phineas."</p><p>"What might have been," she repeated to herself with a sigh. Then her eyes fastened on something up ahead. It was another sign. She couldn't remember there being any more this close to town.</p><p>"You may never see him again," the letters spelled as they came into view at freeway speed.</p><p><em>That's weird,</em> Isabella thought to herself. Then she saw another sign just beyond.</p><p>"You're just gonna keep driving away without saying goodbye?"</p><p><em>And I'm sure that I've never seen that sign before,</em> she thought, even more confused. Once again to her surprise, there was another sign after that.</p><p>"Seriously! This is your last chance! You might never see Phineas ever again!" And another. "This is forever we're talking about!"</p><p>Isabella stomped on her brakes. "That's it! I'm going to drive straight back and see him!" With her newfound resolve, Isabella quickly made a U-turn. "Thanks for the signs, Ferb!" she shouted out the window.</p><p>Ferb waved a hammer where he stood, placing the last few nails.</p><p>
  <strong>How Act Your Age Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><hr/><p>"So," Baljeet stated nonchalantly, "I heard Isabella is off to Tri-State State." He paused there, taking note of Phineas' reaction.</p><p>"Oh, wow, really? Huh." Phineas reached for the bread. "I haven't seen much of her this summer."</p><p>Buford, not caring about the current conversation, interrupted. "Why do parents buy such weird food? Everything's light, low, non, free, or diet."</p><p>Phineas turned back to Baljeet. "So, she's leaving?"</p><p>"Yes." Baljeet couldn't stifle a smirk. "Heh, I always thought the two of you would end up together."</p><p>"I wish! I am so in the friend zone, there."</p><p>"You are<em>—</em>kidding, right?" asked Baljeet. "You do know she had a GIANT crush on you for ages?"</p><p>This was news to Phineas. "Uh, no?"</p><p>Belittling Phineas was reason enough for Buford to join in. "Oh, come on! It was so obvious! She came over to your house every day for eleven years just to see what you were doing!"</p><p>"When she looked at you, her pupils actually formed little hearts! Like, I do not know how that is physically possible—she changed her eyeballs!"</p><p>Glancing back and forth, Phineas mumbled in shock. "I don't believe it! Ferb?"</p><p>Ferb simply nodded.</p><p>Phineas was floored. "W-why didn't you guys ever tell me?"</p><p>"I think that every time somebody did, something highly illogical would always erase your memory."</p><p>"Oh," Phineas shrugged, his usual smile returning to his face. "That's a relief. For a second there, I thought you guys had been holding this significant little detail back all these years for some lame reason, like 'we are guys, we don't talk about feelings,' or something like that."</p><p>The others chuckled nervously. "Yeah," Baljeet said. "And what about you, Mr. Carpe Diem? If you really liked her, and you really believe in seizing the day, why did you not just ask her out, like, forever ago? That seems wildly out of character for you."</p><p>At that, Phineas' face fell.</p><p>"Phineas?" They got no response. "Phineas…"</p><p>"I think we just broke his brain," Baljeet hypothesized.</p><p>"Either that," said Buford, "or the heat of that long-sleeved shirt is gettin' to him."</p><hr/><p>Phineas was welcomed by the timely chime of the Garcia-Shapiro family restaurant. "Phineas, honey, how are you?"</p><p>"Hi, Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro, is Isabella here?"</p><p>"Oh, no, sweetie. She's gone."</p><p>"Gone? Like, driving—car—school—gone?"</p><p>"Gee, that's oddly specific. Were you two by chance singing a song together a minute ago?" Before Phineas had a chance to respond, she continued, "It's too bad you didn't get to see her off. You know, since you were kids, she's had a huge crush on you!"</p><p>Phineas sighed. "So says Baljeet, Buford, and Ferb, Nana Shapiro, the guy I passed walking his dog, that huge billboard sign that I swear wasn't there yesterday—I wish everybody had decided to tell me this like, yesterday, or something."</p><p>"Hey, Phineas!" A customer had just spotted the young man from a table and shouted out to him. "Did you know Isabella has had a crush on you since you were kids?"</p><p>"See?" Phineas gestured for Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro.</p><hr/><p>"Can we drop you anywhere?" Ferb asked.</p><p>Phineas thought about it. "As a matter of fact..."</p><p>A minute later, they had pulled up alongside Isabella, who didn't notice Phineas standing outside her car until she heard a tap on her window. There was that goofy grin she loved. "Phineas?" She rolled down her window halfway before changing her mind and stepping out of the vehicle. "What are you doing?"</p><p>"This." Holding nothing back, Phineas took her face in his hands and brought her lips to his. Pleasantly surprised, she leaned into him, forgetting all else.</p><p>The cars behind them honked. One angry driver shouted, "C'mon, it's green! Time to go!" But the young couple, engaged in blissful first kiss, was completely oblivious to the outside world.</p><p>"Hey, give 'em a break, will ya?" Another driver yelled. "We've been waiting for <em>years</em> for this to happen!"</p><p>"Huh?" The first driver gave them a second look.</p><p>"I never knew she had a thing for him," Vanessa announced over her shoulder.</p><p>"Seriously?" doubted Ferb.</p><p>"Nah, I'm just messing with you. <em>Everyone</em> knew."</p><p>She was right. Already several dozen people had gotten out of their cars to watch. "You guys! Phineas and Isabella are finally together!" realized the first driver enthusiastically, apparently over his previous anger.</p><p>Finally, the two lovers broke apart, blushing a little when they saw the large crowd they had drawn.</p><p>"Three cheers for Phinabella!" someone shouted. "Hip-hip hooray!"</p><p>"Hip-hip hooray!"</p><p>"Hip-hip hooray!"</p><p>Phineas backed up slightly. "This is getting kind of awkward."</p><p>Isabella pulled him back. "Shut up and kiss me some more."</p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! Next on the list is Save Summer! So be sure to favorite, follow, and review, and remember, I don't own Phineas and Ferb or How It Should Have Ended!</strong>
</p><hr/><p>Vanessa pulled up in her expensive convertible. "Hey, Ferbs, you ready?" Ferb climbed into the car and gave his girlfriend a smooch. "Hey, Phineas!" she added.</p><p>"Hi, Nessa!" greeted Phineas. "Where you guys going?"</p><p>"Oh, Ferb's taking me out for Ukrainian food."</p><p>"Have a nice time," Phineas said. "If you happen to catch any of those Russian dubbed episodes that haven't aired in English yet, don't tell me any spoilers!"</p><p>"Wouldn't dream of it," they waved. "See ya!"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Save Summer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The summer snow was falling heavily while Phineas and the gang were hanging by a rope from their rocket at the top of Mount Danville. "It's not moving, Phineas!" Candace was saying, referring to the Earth, in her brother's earpiece. "It's like something's resisting our jets!"</p><p>"I was afraid of that," replied Phineas. "Listen, push the rockets up <em>above</em> the red line! We should be okay if you just do it slow and steady!"</p><p>"Oh, just like the rabbit in the story!"</p><p>"Yes, exact—wait, no! Like the turtle! Like the turtle!"</p><p>"Slow and steady," repeated Candace. She pushed on the sliders. "Slow and steady!" The rockets roared at maximum output.</p><p>Meanwhile at a local coffee shop, two men argued over their drinks. "Oh, come on," one said. "Everybody knows the Earth is round! You'd have to be an idiot to actually believe the Earth is flat!"</p><p>"Oh yeah?" argued the other. "Well, if the Earth is round and spinning on an axis as it orbits the sun, how come we can't feel it moving?"</p><p>At precisely that moment, the Earth lurched in its orbit, and everything not nailed down was flung backwards.</p><p>"Are you sure you can't feel it moving?" the first man shouted over the debris whipping past him while he clung for dear life to a table leg.</p><p>"Oh, this?" answered back the second man from the other table leg. "It's just the building settling..."</p><p>
  <strong>How Phineas and Ferb: Save Summer Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><hr/><p>"Mr. President!" A worried looking White House aide burst into the Oval Office. "A group of evil scientists located in the Tri-State Area have moved the Earth away from the sun and are threatening to plunge us into a new ice age if we don't meet their demands!"</p><p>"A group of, uh, evil scientists, uh, you say?" asked the President.</p><p>"They're calling themselves 'LOVEMUFFIN,' sir."</p><p>"And they're located in the, uh, Tri-State Area?"</p><p>"In Danville, to be precise."</p><p>The President stood up. "Well, then, uh, what are we waiting for? This is a threat to the, uh, United States of America, and the world! And they, uh, just declared war on us! We can, uh, handle this. Mobilize strike teams! The Army, Marines, National Guard, the, uh, Navy Seals, I want them all, uh, down there! Heck, we have already established this as part of the, uh, Marvel universe. Why not, uh, initiate the, uh, Theta Protocol while we're at it! Call in the Avengers!"</p><p>"Right away, sir!" The aide rushed back out the way he came.</p><p>The President sat back down and steepled his fingers on his desk. "Oh, I, uh, forgot to order someone to get me another, uh, tub of pretzels. Where's the Vice President?"</p><hr/><p>
  <em>OR...</em>
</p><p>"Carl!" Monty Monogram exclaimed. "The evil scientists of LOVEMUFFIN have captured all of our agents!"</p><p>"Ugh!" Carl slouched, defeated. "My first day on the job and all my agents get captured!? What am I gonna do?"</p><p>"Simple," replied Monty. "Let's go get them! We have the advantage: we have the best agent with us, and we have the element of surprise! We can't lose!"</p><p>Carl stared at Monty without blinking. "Well, we <em>could</em> still lose, even with the best agent and the element of surprise." He glanced at Agent P. "Right?" Perry shrugged. "I'm just saying, it's not impossible. And I'm not saying we will lose, either, just that, you know, it could happen. Let's not get ahead of ourselves with over-positive thinking."</p><p>Monty folded his arms. "What, you have the mustache, and now you think you're Major Semantics?"</p><p>"Look," Carl said, "I think there's one other advantage we've overlooked."</p><p>"There is?" asked Monty.</p><p>
  <em>Later…</em>
</p><p>"Now the world knows LOVEMUFFIN is not an organization to be trifled with!" Rodney declared.</p><p>"Yeah, meanwhile, you may have plunged the Earth into another ice age," detracted Doofenshmirtz.</p><p>At that moment, a huge robot treehouse controlled by Carl smashed through the wall into LOVEMUFFIN's secret lair. "Robot treehouse smash!" he yelled.</p><p>"What? The O.W.C.A. is here?" Rodney exclaimed, shocked.</p><p>"Yeah, we were gonna try to sneak in and break all the animal agents out quietly, but then I thought, we have all these inventions just sitting in our downstairs lab! All Doof's Inators, plus the Flynn-Fletcher boys' creations, just sitting there all summer; now's a good time to use those! I mean, that's how the last evil scientist that successfully took over the Tri-State Area was defeated."</p><p>Perry appeared through the hole made by Carl, inserted two fingers in his mouth, and whistled. A large robot dog jumped through and crashed into the room, sending the evil scientists scattering. The dog plucked the Shift-the-Earth's-Position-Away-From-the-Sun-Inator up and tossed it outside, snapping its connection with Jupiter's gravitational pull.</p><p>"Now, for the Shrink-Inator," Monty said from the balcony where he had lain hidden at. He pointed the Inator down at the evil scientists. "And, shrink!" Every scientist was zapped. "Next, the Mime-Inator!" He hit the 'Fire' button on another menacing looking machine. "And you're all trapped inside an invisible box!"</p><p>"Saved the day!" Carl climbed out of the treehouse and high-fived Agent P.</p><hr/><p>
  <em>OR…</em>
</p><p>"Actually, I'm not even trying to take over the Tri-State Area today," Doofenshmirtz ranted. "You see, I have a problem: I am very fair-skinned. I don't know if you've noticed. I have to use SPF 120 sunscreen, even on a cloudy day, or I'll burn. I mean, I'll actually burst into flames. And I got this whole crate on sale, and look! It's all 110 SPF! I thought I was getting 120! This is not gonna work. So, rather than return this whole mess, which means I'd have to get in a car, drive down there, wait in line, then answer a bunch of questions about the delicacy of my epidermis, I'm just gonna move the Earth away from the sun <em>just</em> enough that the 110 will work. Simple!"</p><p>Agent P squinted coldly at his nemesis.</p><p>"Hey, you know what I just thought of?" Doof continued to muse. "Next time I have to go shopping for sunscreen, if I can only find SPF 95, or 80, or any other continually diminishing number, I can just come back and move the Earth further and further away, according to my needs. Ooh, I'm a genius!" The evil scientist made a proud gesture with the hand that wasn't holding the mop.</p><p>"To that end, I have created—tada!—the Shift-the-Earth's-Position-Away-From-the-Sun-Inator! I know, the name's a little cumbersome. Heh, I guess my fortune cookie was right, I do tend to overcomplicate things! I wonder if that means these lottery numbers are—OOF!" He was interrupted mid-sentence by Agent P's sucker punch to the face.</p><p>Doofenshmirtz recovered and took a swing at Agent P with his mop. Perry sneakily caught the mop and climbed on it, sitting at its edge behind Dr. D as he rested it by the handle on his shoulder. Confused, Doof looked around for his nemesis. Agent P tapped on his shoulder, attracting his attention, then pulled on his long, pointy nose, escaping by jumping into the carton of sunscreen.</p><p>"Ow!"</p><p>Doofenshmirtz retaliated by swinging at the container. He whipped it hard enough for it to slam against the Inator, causing Perry to fall on the 'Fire' button. A green beam of light connected between Earth and Jupiter, causing the Earth to shift in the direction of the gas giant.</p><p>"Ehehe," cackled Doofenshmirtz. "You fired my Ina—doh!"</p><p>Agent P slapped Doofenshmirtz across the face with the mop, again and again.</p><p>Meanwhile, the Earth shook. The kids were too occupied with the Ferbographic projections across the globe to notice, although the crowds listening to <em>'Summer All Over the World!'</em> grew apprehensive.</p><p>"Whoa, what was that?" Buford asked.</p><p>"We are rocking this place!" was all Phineas said.</p><p>Back at <em>Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated</em>, Dr. D was looking at his wristwatch. "And I think we just went to commercial. Whew! What a cliffhanger, eh?"</p><p>Agent P was making his way back out the door.</p><p>"Hey, Perry the Platypus, where are you going?" Doofenshmirtz called. "You're just gonna leave? Not to tell you how to do your job, just pointing out the usual routine here, but you're not gonna, I don't know, hit my self-destruct button? Pull the reverse switch? I have those on this model, see?"</p><p>Agent P shook his head.</p><p>"Really? You're just gonna walk back to OWCA headquarters and use that secret agent handshake password to get in and just forget about me? After you had the upper hand just seconds ago? Harsh, man."</p><p>The door slammed shut.</p><p>"Curse you, regularly scheduled commercial breaks and the lazy writers who utilize them to make you gloss over recently transpired events!" Doofenshmirtz shouted. "But not you, Perry the Platypus, I won't curse you this time, because you could have easily destroyed my Inator just now, and you didn't. But don't think I'll forget this so easily, either, you—oh, look!" A light on the wall was blinking. "My pizza delivery guy trap has just activated!"</p><p>Doofenshmirtz made his way to the hallway that connected his building to the parking garage. He flipped on the light switch.</p><p>The trap held a young boy, a man in a tracksuit, a British-looking fellow, and a man wearing a business suit from the nineteenth century. "Professor Time? My name is Milo Murphy, and the future is going to be plunged into an early ice age! We need your help!"</p><p>"Wait, you're not my pizza delivery guy!" Doofenshmirtz reacted. "This is my pizza guy delivery trap!"</p><p>
  <strong>Thanks for reading! </strong>
</p><hr/><p>"One measly rocket on one mountain isn't going to move the Earth, Phineas," Candace pointed out.</p><p>"That's why we've enlisted the help of other kids around the world. See? There's Floria and Abdul on Mount Kilimanjaro, Ganash and Kabul on Mount Everest, Vsevolod and Vanko at the top of Mount Elbrus, and Lupert and Eorpwald on Mount Haggenhuge. Eorpwald's the goat. While they finish fine-tuning, we'll move—"</p><p>"Wait, wait, wait," interrupted Candace. "Are we supposed to assume those kids are all genius engineering prodigies like you and Ferb? Like, do they all fit into a daily routine like the one that our lives seem to be structured around, too? Are they regularly building impossible inventions, carpe-ing all those diems, all while having no discernable financial backing? Do they have an older sibling trying to bust them? Or a pet who always disappears at the beginning of each day and eventually turns up safely at the end of the day? Do their inventions always disappear, too?"</p><p>"Hmm, you know, Candace, I don't know," Phineas said.</p><p>"It sort of cheapens the lives you and Ferb live, if there are all these other people out there who can build amazing inventions and stuff, too. Plus having the universe bending to their wills, and the Mysterious Force always giving them favors, et cetera."</p><p>"Look, can we get back to saving the world, please?"</p><p>"I just wanna know why nobody else is talking about this, that's all."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Summer Belongs To You!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In the Flynn-Fletchers' backyard, the Fireside girls were anxiously awaiting the gang's arrival. "Where are they?" Gretchen impatiently asked.</p><p>Ginger reassuringly put a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Don't worry, they'll make it!"</p><p>"Seven seconds till sundown!" announced Milly, glancing at her watch.</p><p>Holly immediately suggested, "Maybe it'll help if we count."</p><p>The Fireside Girls began to count down in unison. "Five! Four! Three! Two!"</p><p>Just then, Phineas, Ferb, and the gang could be heard screaming for their lives.</p><p>"Aaaahhhh! I immediately regret my decision!" Phineas had time to scream before he, Ferb, Isabella, Candace, Baljeet, and Buford hit the ground splat after falling a hundred feet through the air. The dust took a moment to clear to reveal their crumpled bodies and wrecked bicycles.</p><p>Gretchen dropped to her knees in despair. "Why?!" she cried out, dramatically extending her hands to their corpses. "Did you really think the Power of Belief would make you immune to gravity?!"</p><p>
  <strong>How Summer Belongs To You! Should Have Ended</strong>
</p><p>With thanks to FanficFan920 and TheWGPM for submitting ideas. Sorry I couldn't use them all!</p><hr/><p>"Ooh, I believe we can," Clay Aiken was singing, just as someone else barged into the backyard and turned the tune into a duet.</p><p>"I believe we can!"</p><p>"And that's the measure, the measure, of a man."</p><p>"Ooh, that's the measure of a man!"</p><p>"Chaka Khan," Phineas remarked to Ferb. "Nice."</p><p>"We'll make it back here," the stunt singers continued, "to where we bega-an…"</p><p>Before they could finish the song, the wing everyone was standing on collapsed under their combined weights.</p><p>"Or at least that's the plan," Phineas improvised, causing everyone to laugh.</p><p>"'Co-ourse!" Chaka Khan added in song form. "First you're gonna have to fix this wing! Yeah! Say, where's Perry?" She looked around. "And while we're on the subject, where're all those other extras that were on the wing with you a second ago?"</p><hr/><p>"All right, you got your breakfast, what's eating you?" Stacy punned.</p><p>"Well, you know how Jeremy's in France for another week?" Candace asked, while playing with her noodles.</p><p>"Yeah, so?"</p><p>"Do you know what they have in France?"</p><p>"The Perrymids?" Stacy did a spit-take when she caught what she just said. "I mean―the pyramids! Perry's not in France! I mean―I don't know where Perry is!" she frantically huffed.</p><p>Candace gave Stacy a strange look. "No! French girls!"</p><p>Stacy <em>whewed</em> inwardly.</p><hr/><p>The plane soared majestically over the calm, blue ocean. The sun beamed down directly overhead, casting the plane's shadow directly below on the rippling waves. Phineas banked to the starboard side, headed towards their destination in Tokyo. "So, what'd you guys think of the Pacific Ocean?"</p><p>"It's been fifteen hours! Buford hungry!" Buford whined.</p><p>"I'm exhausted," stretched Isabella with a yawn.</p><p>"I have to pee so badly…" moaned Baljeet, holding his hands between his legs.</p><p>"Phineas, it's already almost 10 o'clock at night Danville time, are we going to go to sleep on the plane?" asked Candace.</p><p>"Nope," answered Phineas. "We're staying up for 40 hours straight, flying on a plane with no food, water, or bathrooms! Isn't this the best day ever?" He looked out the window and smiled at the others, oblivious to their discomfort. "Next stop, Tokyo!"</p><hr/><p>The Sunbeater 3000 splashed its way across the Atlantic with baguettes in tow and the kids inside. "Well, looks like everything worked out for the best," Phineas said over the background music. "That giant wave really put us back on schedule, we might even arrive back in Danville ahead of time! You know, barring any unforeseen mishaps."</p><p>Right at that moment, Ferb's steering controls broke off in his hands.</p><p>"Oh, like that," Phineas said, looking at Ferb's controls. "That's what I'm talking about." Then the jet engine fell off the aft side. "And that." More pieces of what was left of the plane fell off. "And that. Yeah, this is all included in what I was talking about earlier." Phineas shot a deadpan look straight ahead. "Lesson learned, never raise any red flags."</p><p>"Kinda like that saying," Candace said, "anything that can go wrong will go wrong. What was that saying called again? Like, some sort of law, Michael's―no, Milo's―no, um―Murphy's Law! That's it!"</p><hr/><p>"Phineas, how are we going to get off this island?" Baljeet asked.</p><p>"Well," Phineas said with a smile, "we'll just have to fix the boat."</p><p>"With what?" Candace yelled from her miserable state on the beach.</p><p>Phineas marched across the sand, taking in his surroundings. "There's plenty here, all we need is our―"</p><p>"―Imagination!" A voice from somewhere offscreen finished his sentence for him.</p><p>Phineas turned around to see that it was a sponge in a white shirt and tie that had spoken.</p><p>"Oh no!" Isabella gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. "It's the meme!"</p><p>"Use… Your… Imagination!" The Talking Sponge brought his hands over his head and created a rainbow between them.</p><p>"Look! A sponge and a starfish!" Phineas ejaculated. "There's gotta be something we can make out of this!" Realizing what he was saying, he retracted. "Aw, oh, no, that's ridiculous…"</p><p>Moving on to inspect the rest of the island, Phineas brainstormed. "We could tie those two palm trees into a raft and add a supersonic outboard motor, oh, wait. We don't have anything to cut the trees with. And we don't have an outboard motor. I know! We can soup up this ox so he can run on a conveyor belt that would charge a―oh! We don't have a conveyor belt. And we don't have any soup."</p><p>"Not to mention, you're never gonna make it!" Buford quickly reminded him with a cackle.</p><p>"We'll make it!" Phineas pumped his fist determinedly in the air. "After all, we've got―uh, we've got the seats, we've still got one rubber band, and we've got―we've got sand!" He bent down and scooped some up.</p><p>"Hey, maybe you could make an hourglass and watch the time slip away!"</p><p>"We've got―" Phineas looked around. "Candace has her cell phone!"</p><p>"Yeah, but I don't have international coverage," she said, extracting it from her pocket. "See, I can't get a signal here, just like I couldn't get one in the Himalayas."</p><p>Phineas tried something else. "What if somebody says, 'what, did you think a bunch of parts were just going to fall out of the sky?'"</p><p>At that moment, a giant robot fell off the airplane it had been dangling from, dropped from the stratosphere, and crashed onto the beach behind them.</p><p>"I crash, therefore I am…" the robot said weakly, its final words before powering down.</p><p>"That trick always solves everything," Phineas chuckled. "Just like like time travel. Oh, good ol' Chekhov's gun."</p><hr/><p>
  <em>But this is how it really should have ended…</em>
</p><p>"Ladies and gentlemen," Phineas said as the city skyline loomed in front of them. "Tokyo, Japan."</p><p>"Stacy has family down there," Candace declared. "We should visit."</p><p>"We're one step ahead of you, Candace." Phineas pulled the plane into a steep dive, causing his sister to scream, pulling up at the last second as he prepared to land on the street below. Cars scrambled to get out of the way of the incoming plane. It hit the pavement, all grindy and sparky, since the landing gear had neglected to be extended, though this didn't seem to damage the plane nearly as much as it did the rest of the city. After spinning and sliding uncontrollably for quite a ways, the plane finally skidded to a halt, just mere feet from hitting a hunched over lady who sat serenely on the sidewalk.</p><p>"Whoops!" Phineas hit a button, and the landing gear popped out. "I thought it sounded a little grindy and sparky."</p><p>The cockpit opened and Ferb climbed out to approach the woman. "<em>Kon'nichiwa! Suteishī no tomodachidesu!</em>" he said.</p><p>In perfect English, the old woman turned and yelled, "Hey everybody! Phineas and Ferb are here!"</p><p>With that, a bunch of police sirens began wailing and patrol cars pulled out of nowhere to surround the plane. Japanese police flooded out to fill the street and started locking the kids in handcuffs.</p><p>"Wow, Stacy sure has a lot of cousins who are police officers," Phineas remarked, not realizing what was really going on as he was led to a squad car. "Hey, do you guys have some vegetable oil we can use? We need to refuel."</p><p>After a scene wipe, Phineas, Ferb, and the gang were standing behind bars. Around them, their fellow Japanese prisoners started singing and dancing.</p><p>
  <em>Welcome to Tokyo,<br/></em>
  <em>You were locked in our jail.<br/></em>
  <em>For causing mass destruction of our<br/></em>
  <em>Beautiful town!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>As for a list of misdemeanors<br/></em>
  <em>You've violated in our town square,<br/></em>
  <em>You don't have passports,<br/></em>
  <em>Also crashed a big UFO!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>This unregistered airplane<br/></em>
  <em>Flying in a restricted area,<br/></em>
  <em>Upset the traffic control tower<br/></em>
  <em>Like the fact that it flies.</em>
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  <strong>Thanks for reading! That's the last P&amp;F HISHE! I've covered all the special episodes now. (So not counting two-parters like Where's Perry? or The Klimpaloon Ultimatum or It's About Time, etc., which would be too many to do and aren't generally long enough to really make a good HISHE out of.) So, yeah. It's been a blast. Maybe next I'll do a P&amp;F Honest Trailer or a CinemaSins or a Pitch Meetings parody, or something, I don't know, or maybe I should leave ideas like those for somebody else to try! Well, anyways, until next time!</strong>
</p><hr/><p>Candace stood in Buford's garage, wondering what she should do. "Wait, Buford never took my bike!"</p><p>"Noted." Buford cocked an eyebrow.</p><p>"There's one right there!" Phineas pointed out.</p><p>"Phineas, I am not gonna get on a silly little tricycle."</p><p>"Candace, we're in a hurry! Just get on the―"</p><p>"Phineas, there is no way I'm getting on that thing!" Candace screamed.</p><p>"Okay, no need to yell," Phineas said. "The conditions of Buford's bet didn't include <em>you</em> being in our backyard by sundown, so have fun walking." And with that, everyone zoomed out of the garage on their bikes, leaving Candace all to herself.</p><p>"Aw, do you think I was too hard on her back there?" Phineas asked Ferb as they raced down the hill. "Now I feel bad."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Sorry, one more AN! Have you ever wondered what Phineas and Ferb's spirit animal would be? Besides a platypus, I mean. Ever heard of the Arctic Tern? It's this medium-sized bird that looks kind of like a swallow. Every year, the Arctic Tern undertakes the longest migration in the animal kingdom. At the end of summer, it leaves its breeding grounds in Greenland, Iceland, and the Netherlands to fly south―far, far south. It flies all the way around the world to Antarctica in only two months, where it spends the winter―which is summertime in the southern hemisphere. Their search for an endless summer means that no other animal sees more sunlight than the Arctic Tern!</strong>
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  <strong>Then, as the southern winter approaches, this bird makes its round trip complete, flying all the way back home to nest. This means that every year, Arctic Terns fly over 19,000 km (11,800 miles), twice, for twenty years! That's equal to flying all the way to the Moon and back over the course of its lifetime! It's most appropriate for SBTY! and makes the Arctic Tern one of my new favorite birds!</strong>
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